Planking on an Elephant's Head

I slept most of Wednesday and only emerged from my hotel for the most essential supplies i.e. water, diet coke and pomegranates, the latter being my new addiction - I eat them in my room with my swiss army knife. On Thursday I had arranged to meet an Indian man called Manish who my friend, Paula, had previously hired as a guide (and later a 'bodyguard' in Delhi). My rickshaw was ten minutes late to our agreed meeting place and I couldn't see him anywhere so I asked the nearest man if I could use his phone; as I dialled the number and pressed the call button the screen flashed up with the name Manish! "You know Manish??", I asked in surprise - what were the chances? At that moment Manish appeared with a Diet Coke in his hand that he'd bought especially for me as Paula had told him I like it (it isn't easy to find here). He showed me around Jaipur's ancient Amber Palace which had taken over 150 years to build. He was unlike a lot of the men I had encountered here because he didn't stare or ask a thousand intrusive questions; instead we chatted about India and our respective lives.

Jaipur's Amber Palace.

Ancient floating saffron gardens.

One of the many many honey bee hives in Jaipur.

We went to a temple and a priest who looked about 100 years old wearing only an orange loin cloth painted a red bindi on our foreheads. I was expecting him to ask for money afterwards but because I was with my Indian guide he didn't. In fact, having a man with me, particularly an Indian one, meant I was protected from everyone who sees me as a 'walking wallet' and I got 'Indian prices' for everything (prices are never marked and usually people take one look at my white face and quadruple the price). We sat and had tea with his family members and friends; I felt very comfortable around them and we chatted for ages. Next he took me to an elephant village which is a charity set up to promote the welfare of the Indian elephants.

His friend took us to the elephant sanctuary on his motorbike and he asked Manish if he could take a photo of us on it because he had never spoken to a white person before!

They asked me whether I wanted to ride the elephant the western way or the fun way, naturally I chose the fun way and this meant riding on my own with no saddle or seat! They asked the same question about getting on the elephant - did I want to use a ladder or do it the fun way?? Stupid question. The elephant held out its trunk for me and I stood on it while holding its ears from the front and it lifted me over its head. Right at that moment my trousers split at the bum all the way from the crotch down to the back of my knees and everything was on show!!! I was planking on the elephant's head with my backside on show and I had no idea how I was going to manoeuvre on to it whilst maintaining what little dignity I had left! Never have I been in a more ridiculous situation!

PLANKING on an elephant's head!!!

Eventually I got in to a seated position on the elephant's shoulders after several minutes of thrashing around; I quickly tucked my trousers around me and tried desperately to forget what had just happened whilst searching the ten Indian men's faces that were watching to gauge how much they had seen. They taught me how to 'drive' the elephant as I sat on its neck with its shoulder joints undulating beneath me making me feel like I was going to topple off!

Riding the elephant Indian style!

As soon as I got off I wrapped my cardigan around me and scuttled off. Manish was a perfect gentleman and assured me nobody saw anything but I highly doubt that and I think he was just trying to be nice.

It started raining like crazy when we were waiting for a bus back-this is me with my Indian guide completely soaked.

The bus was full of locals and they just couldn't believe what they saw when a soaked, bare-shouldered western girl got on with a Indian man. Manish took me to buy some trousers straight away thankfully! We ate lunch at a village cafe and the cooks were shocked when I asked for the parathas (Indian bread) to be more spicy. The food was insanely cheap and tasty. After eating Manish took me to get my palm read; the man asked me nothing about myself and proceeded to tell me that I'm going to live until at least 80, my job line shows I'm going to start a career at the age of 28 and may even start my own business. He says I am not appreciated enough by people around me and my downfalls are a quick temper and being too much of a perfectionist!

I had arranged to meet the English couple for dinner (the ones I had met on the train to Agra - they were now in the same place as me) and I had to down two coffees because I was exhausted from being up all night with infuriatingly itchy mosquito bites. We all like spicy food and implored the waiters to hit us with their best attempt but it still wasn't hot enough! We aren't sure whether Indians being hardcore with spicy food is a myth or whether they dull it down for us despite our relentless requests to make it as spicy as possible; although there are chilies in a lot of dishes I think India's reputation for spicy food is misinterpreted and it is perhaps spices rather than hotness that this refers to. As we left the restaurant a man with a creepy puppet insisted on putting on a show for us - he gave us all a handmade toy elephant despite us saying we had no money to give him. He asked for a souvenir in return, we had nothing so Sam gave him the equivalent of £1, I gave him 6p and a shopping receipt and Hetty gave him a hand massage! He seemed satisfied with this and so we got up and went on our way!

One of my favourite days in India so far!